Oh yes, there's more
On Tue, Feb 24, 2009 at 7:31 PM, [Husband, hereafter called "Obstinate Ignormaus"] wrote:
Hello,
I dislike coming across as harsh and impolite. But, I feel slighted by your response below. I take exception to the term “our favorite group”. This is condescending and shows lack of respect for our judgement. It is on your basis of judgement upon which we disagree and protest your decision. I reiterate my protest and request that [my daughter's group] be reinstated to go on to the semi’s and finals. If you were there Saturday night you would understand what I mean and not respond as you did below. Here is the email I sent on Sunday.
***
At which point he copies and pastes his previous email. As though I hadn’t really read it the first time, and if I just read it in earnest, I would completely see his point.
I think this man has never been told “no.” And I can see why — he’s obnoxious as f*ck, pardon my French.
I couldn’t help myself:
Dear [Obstinate Ignoramus],
You are right. With all due respect to you as a person, sir, I absolutely do not respect your judgment. I respect your opinion, to which you are completely entitled, but not your judgment in evaluating a contemporary collegiate a cappella contest.
Your daughter is in the group in question, which means you have an inherent bias and therefore cannot objectively determine which group should win.
More importantly, you have no collegiate or professional background in vocal music or contemporary a cappella. Therefore, you are not qualified to determine how the [your daughter's group] or any other group should score on the basis of technical music and performance elements.
I assure you that, nine times out of ten, every single group at a given competition — even the last-place group — absolutely thinks theirs was the best group, and they leave competition utterly appalled that they did not win. Their parents and fans and friends feel the same way. As far as I’m concerned, your protest about this contest’s results is no different.
There is nothing to indicate to me that there was a flaw or foul play in that night’s judging, so there is no reason to reconsider the results or advance any other groups but the top two. Our judges were all experienced professionals that, regardless of birthplace, come from varied backgrounds within the vocal music community. And the fact that they agreed almost unanimously about [your daughter's group's] scores and overall placement only affirms my belief in the sanctity of the results.
Please take a moment to appreciate that the evaluation of any art form is entirely subjective. The best we can do, then, is to ask qualified vocal music professionals to lend their expertise toward being as objective as possible.
If your experience was different than theirs, for whatever reason, then so be it. This doesn’t mean that your opinion has been disrespected, or your group wronged, or the judging flawed. It just means that [your daughter's group] are not entitled to win.
Should your daughter or any member of [your daughter's group] wish to discuss the contest with me, I would welcome hearing from them.
Regards,
[Your Wake-Up Call]
***
Perhaps if [Obstinate Ignoramus] read my redacted version of this e-mail chain, complete with the substitution of “your daughter’s group” for his daughter’s group, he would see things more clearly. It could not be more obvious to me.
I’ve never seen parents go to bat for their (ahem) grown children quite like these Acadaddies do for their Acadaughters. What the freak?
I heart Millennials and their parents. We actually had parents show up to a student protest regarding our new housing policy. Awesome. If I were a student and my parents were sending nasty e-mails regarding one of my extra-curricular activities, I’d be embarrassed!
hahahaha I’d be like, “Guys, er, could you run along now?” What’s gonna be REALLY hilarious is when this turns into middle-aged brats pouting in the background as their elderly parents wage illogical battle on their behalf. Imagine!
Amanda, this is HILARIOUS. I am so sorry that you have to put up with those kinds of people (parents) all the time. But I must say, your responses were great!
This is hilarious to me. Micah and I (both employed by universities) deal with some crazy parents, but this, my friend, takes the cake.
Your responses are beautiful. True works of art, if you ask me.
One day I spent an hour on the phone with parents who could not understand why their 20-year-old “child” was not going to pass a class because he had 11 absences and had only completed 3 of 14 online quizzes, never mind the fact he just wasn’t that smart.
I immediately came home and made my children do things like hang up their coats and set the table for dinner. All the while, I explained to them that it’s important that they take responsibility for themselves and not wait for Mama to do everything for them. I knew I was being crazy, but it was confirmed when my 5-year-old listened to my entire rant and then patiently explained that her 2-year-old sisters could not reach the coat rack or the plates…..
How dare you reprint my email without my explicit permission. See you in court.